SGA: Dear Mer
by spookysister7
Summary: Letters to Rodney from his sister following the events of Miller's Crossing and beyond. Parallel to 'Doctor Meredith'. Continued by popular demand. Season 4 spoilers.
1. Dear Mer

Dear Mer,

After the forth night in a row that I lay sleepless, waiting for the nightmares to come, I decided to write you this letter. I know that you are back to work by now, and that you face things like that every day. I don't know how you do it. Honestly, I never expected you to be able to handle something that I couldn't.

While I am being honest, I'm mad at you, Mer. I like to think I am a forgiving person, willing to overlook a lot of things, but this, this is very difficult for me. That's not to say I don't love you, Mer, because I do. You CAN love someone and be angry with them at the same time, as you have hopefully figured out by now. But going through what we went through, what my daughter and husband had to suffer through, not knowing… I don't blame you entirely, Mer. I knew what I was getting into, but now, now I am seriously considering never…

You talk about Dad a lot, you know that? "Dad would like to see us working together." Do you remember Mom, Mer? Do you remember that after Dad left us, how she raised you through your difficult teenage period with no help from him? How he remarried and saw you for a couple of hours every few weeks? How Mom tried her best to get you everything you needed, and you needed more every day? How we both worked, Mer, to get you enough money to enter the science fair, to go on the field trips, to… Maybe it's a guy thing, to focus on your father. Maybe you do remember Mom. I just, I get scared Mer. I get scared that I'll forget how much we loved you. It's hard to stay in touch with something like that.

I guess I'm rambling. I'm sure I'll be lucky if you read this far. Three in the morning is not a good time for clear thought. Just, don't be selfish, Mer. Remember that. And remember, whatever happens, that I love you.

Love Always,

Your Sister


	2. Dear Jeanie

Dear Jeanie,

I received your letter, late of course. (And I read it. All of it.) You're right, I haven't thought of Mom in a while. But, recently, children have been on my mind. Not my own, of course. We just found out that Teyla is pregnant, and, no, it wasn't Sheppard (Kirk). Surprise, surprise. It was one of her people. But, as I think I told you, her people have disappeared. We're looking for them, but so far no luck. Anyway, that got me to thinking. We're all real protective of her and the baby (especially Sheppard). Teyla says it's a boy, by the way. And I was thinking about how we would feel if something happened to Teyla and we were left to explain it to her son. It would be terrible.

I'm sorry I wasn't around more for you. I know you and Mom worked hard to get me through school and now I realize I kind of abandoned you. Honestly, at the time I was focused on getting my Masters… but I guess that doesn't make much of a difference. Just, sorry.

How are you? Are you happy?

Your Brother,

Rodney

PS: Tell the rug-rat I said hi; and your husband too.


	3. Dear Mrs Miller

TWO WEEKS LATER

Dear Mrs. Miller,

The United States Air Force regrets to inform you that your brother, Dr. Meredith Rodney McKay, currently serving as a civilian advisor, has been declared Missing in Action. Please be assured that all efforts are being made in his recovery. No further information is available at this time.

Sincerely,

General Landry, US Air Force

Please see attached

-000-

Jeanie-

We _will_ get him back. That's a promise.

John Sheppard


	4. Dear Colonel Sheppard

AN: Thank you for the reviews! In case there is some confusion, these letters occur during my other story "Doctor Meredith".

-000-

Dear Colonel Sheppard,

I know that you are doing everything you can to find Mer, and I know you can't really tell me any details. We don't talk much, but one thing he has told me is that you never leave a man behind. I can only hope that you find him before something irreparable happens. I will keep you all in my thoughts. When you find him, tell him I love him.

Good luck,

Jeanie


	5. Sister Jeanie

Sister Jeanie-

Do not give up hope. Colonel Sheppard and all of Atlantis are searching every possible planet to find Rodney. Please be assured that we will soon discover his whereabouts and be able to safely retrieve him. Ronon and I have contacted every world we know of, and all have agreed to keep their eyes open for any sign of Rodney. It cannot be much longer until we hear some news of him.

Again, please do not give up hope. We _will_ find him and return him safely home.

Ancestors bless you and your family,

Teyla

-000-

We'll find him.

Ronon


	6. Unfinished

A letter found, unfinished, in Rodney's quarters and forwarded to Jeanie-

Dear Jeanie,

Since it looks like it's going to take a while to fix, I thought I'd better tell you that I am currently residing in a female body. Yes, ha ha, get your giggles out now. And no, this isn't like the Cadman situation. My body has been, temporarily, turned into a woman.

I know what you're going to say, and, yes, I admit it. This time it was my fault. Well, really it was the Ancient's stupid machine… but nevermind, because Radek and I are fixing as we speak.

The thing is, see, I've been in this _condition_ for almost two weeks now, and I've discovered some things. For one, people look at you differently as a woman. I've come to appreciate your reasons for dropping out of the game, now. I mean, some of these IDIOTS look everywhere but where they're supposed to when I talk, and when I tell them what to do, you'd think I was asking them to jump off a cliff! There was none of that foolishness when I was male! It's absolutely degrading!

A second thing I've come to realize is just how physically weak I am now. Not that I'm saying that some women can't be just as strong as some men, but this body I have is about the same general size and shape as yours, and the other day when Ronon slapped me on the back, he nearly sent me to the floor! I mean, usually it stings for days, but this was different. And don't even get me into Sheppard's gun retraining! The stupid gun kept slipping out of my hands! It's not my fault they make the things so big, and he about snapped my wrist just showing me the proper stance in this new body. These breasts are very inconvenient, you know. I don't know how you stand it.

Anyway, I think Sheppard's going to make me go on a mission soon, whether I get this fixed or not. So, if you don't hear from me for a while, I'm probably


	7. A Letter Never Sent

A letter never sent-

Meredith-

How dare you! How dare you go and get yourself captured and leave me here to worry? How dare you, worse still, get captured as a WOMAN?! You, of all people, a woman! I was worried enough about you as a man, sure that they had you in some lab somewhere slaving day and night for some evil warlord, exposed to radiation and God knows what, maybe tortured for information, but THIS! This gives me the kind of nightmares I NEVER wanted to have about you. You don't have the slightest idea how to protect yourself as a woman, do you? You don't know how to keep yourself from being noticed, how to make yourself unattractive so that you don't draw the wrong kind of attention. Heck, you probably don't even realize that men are simultaneously turned on and aggravated when a woman is smarter than them. That's a BAD combination, Mer. And you won't know enough to keep your head down, will you? In fact, you'll probably rely on your 'smarts' to get you out of this jam you got yourself in. And that's the worst thing you can do. And now, now I have this image of you in my head, terrified, and the things being done to you… It makes me want to scrub my brain, okay?! That's how bad it is. And here I sit, unable to do anything but worry. Why did you have to go? Why did you have to get caught? Are you okay?

Love always,

Jeanie


	8. Dear Jeanie S

(From Slashy version)

Dear Jeanie,

Well, I'm back. I'm sure you've been dreadfully worried about me these last nine months. Sorry about that. Actually, I was writing this to ask you a very big favor. You see, while I was… gone, I met this woman and we became quite good friends- the whole captive bonding thing, you know? Anyway, she was pregnant, but something went wrong and she didn't make it. Before she… died, she made me promise I'd take care of her child. I want to, but I'm afraid I didn't come out of my captivity unscathed. You see, there's a chance that I might die pretty soon. So I'm asking you if you and your husband would be willing to take this child if I don't make it. I need to know soon, the clock is ticking here. I'm sorry about springing all this on you in a letter. I'm really sorry, Jeanie.

Love always,

Meredith Rodney McKay


	9. My Child S

(From Slashy version)

Jeanie- this is a note the mother left for her child when it was old enough. If you decide to take the child, please show it this letter someday.

My Child-

I want you to know that your father and I both loved you and wanted you. But there are some things that happen in life that are beyond our control. I have found you a loving family and a safe home, my only regret is that I was not able to raise you myself. Be good, my child. Always reach for the stars because one day you will catch them.

My love is always with you,

Mother


	10. Dear, Dear Mer S

(From Slashy version)

Dear, dear Mer,

I can hardly believe I am writing a letter to you instead of running to your side, but, as the military has repeatedly told me, they do not facilitate house calls. I know Dr. Beckett is trying his best, but… I just can't stand the thought of losing you, Mer.

I won't ask what happened. I know that's unimportant right now. Of course we'll take the baby! Do you have any thoughts about a name yet? Is it a boy or a girl? I want you to know that we will treat the baby as if it is our own, no matter what happens. So, don't worry Mer. Just get better.

Love and prayers,

Jeanie


End file.
